We can all feel this constant presence of a better life, of choices which we know on some level can only be made at this point in our lives. And when we see people who are so clearly allowing themselves to be held back, it seems the clear solution to encourage them to let go, to be taken by the power of the person they could become if they allowed themselves to be.

It is the moment — and we all encounter them — where we realize that we are creatures of habit, after all. We desire comfort, and we can’t understand a world in which we only have a chance of getting it. It’s easy to feel ashamed about these moments of fear and complacency, but it’s more important to consider why we have them. And why, more importantly, it is so easy for us to recognize and dismiss them in the lives of others. 

It all seemed so easy and clear when we listened to her problems and had the perfect amount of distance and objectivity on the whole deal. We had become therapists, and the issues that everyone else was facing were math equations that just the right amount of tough love and one-liners could solve. It’s always simple when you’re peeking in at the lives of others, and can remove all of the complicated, grey elements that inevitably involve themselves when you are tied up to the situation emotionally. “Come on,” we seemed to be saying to her, “This should be obvious.”